I sincerely believe that it is far more beneficial and far less costly to help a child build confidence than it is to fix an adult who has little or none.

Men, celebrate the women in your life. Women, celebrate yourself.

Many women don’t ever consider how awesome they really are.  We focus on all our weaknesses, flaws and imperfections.  We don’t think we accomplish enough.  We don’t think we do things good enough.  We are always striving to be better and we fail to see ourselves in a realistic way.

Think about how an average day ends for the average women with a family.   After completing a hard day of work or taking care of the home and kids, she is preparing supper for the family.  After everyone has been fed, the dishes are done and some family members head out for evening activities.    Younger children are sent to their rooms to do their homework while the dishes are done and the house tidied up.  Laundry is put in the washer and the pets are fed.  Lunches are prepared for the next day.  The last of the milk was used at supper, so mom runs out to the store.  The gas is almost empty, so she stops to get some gas.  Then she remembers that the kids have no lunch money and she has to run to the bank.   She gets home just when her husband comes in from his meeting.  He sits down and turns on the TV to watch one of his favourite shows.  Mom likes the show too but has a few things to do before sitting down with him.

After paying some bills and checking her emails, mom makes a couple of coffees and sits down with hubby to relax for a few minutes.   When the show is over, mom tells her husband she is tired and going to bed.  The news has come on, so he quickly mumbles, ‘Good-night” and remains sitting.

Mom goes into the kitchen.  She rinses out the coffee cups, puts away the dishes that are now dry,  takes meat out of the freezer for tomorrow’s supper, checks the breakfast food situation, gets the coffee pot ready for breakfast and lets out the dogs.  Next she goes to the laundry room, takes the clothing out of the dryer and folds it into a basket.  She takes the clean laundry into the bedrooms and puts it away.   She picks up any clothing that has found its place on the floor and puts it in the laundry hamper.   Then she goes back and lets the dogs back in.  She checks their water and gives them a treat.  Then she goes into the bathroom, brushes her teeth, washes her face, puts on face cream, brushes her hair, cuts her nails and tidies up the bathroom.  She sits down at her computer and checks her daily to-do list, crossing off items that have been done and adding any new things that have come to mind.  She writes a new grocery list for things to pick up the next day and notices a note from her daughter’s teacher that hasn’t been read.  She reads the note, writes a reply and puts the note with her daughter’s lunch bag.

Finally, mom goes around and checks to make sure the doors are all locked.  As she passes through the living room, her husband says, “I thought you said you were going to bed an hour ago?”  Wife smiles and mumbles, “I did”.   Hubby replies, “Well, it’s been a long day and I’m tired, so I’m going to bed’.  And he did.

Do you get the point?  Women don’t think they accomplish much but they really accomplish so much and we need to celebrate this.   It doesn’t matter if you are married, single, living with someone, or living alone, women tend to try and accomplish more that we can possibly do and then we beat ourselves up for not doing enough.   We need to celebrate our accomplishments big or small and celebrate others around us.

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Teach your children to be financially responsible

Many adults today are not financially responsible.  They don’t know how to budget for their expenses and often don’t have any savings at all.  They live week to week, spending every cent they have and using that convenient plastic card when they run out of money.

  • If you have grown up in a home where everything is charged and your parents are up to their eyeballs in debt, it’s unlikely that you will be able to responsibly handle your money.
  • If you have grown up in a home where you have been given everything you want, you won’t feel any responsibility for the money you earn and will expect to have whatever your little heart desires.

It is important to teach your children how to spend and save money efficiently so they will become responsible adults.   The world pressures us to spend more than we earn by using credit whenever possible and we need to learn how make good decisions so we don’t end up with mountains of debt.

Here are some ideas to help your children learn the value of money:

  1. Set a good example by using cash when you buy things.   Your children will imitate what you do and if you use credit cards, they will do the same thing and think it is okay.  Remember, it is way to easy to slap down plastic and not think about making those payments later.
  2. Give them an allowance based on their age and what jobs you expect them to do in return.   If the jobs are done, they don’t get their allowance.  When kids are paid to do work, they learn the value of working and getting paid.  However, some family chores should not receive monetary payment (making bed, picking up toys, doing dishes) but should receive payment in praise for helping and being part of the family.  Paid work could include cleaning the basement, vacuuming, taking out the garbage and cutting grass.
  3. Guide them as to how they should spend their money.  Teach them the difference between wants and needs.  It is so easy to spend money on things we want but don’t need.  Encourage them to save some and also donate to a church/charity.  A reasonable percentage might be saving 20-30%, giving 10% and spending the rest.
  4. Open a bank account for their savings and as they get older add a chequing account so they will be ready to pay for item they need or a small monthly bill like a cell phone.
  5. Let your child shop for their own items.  A small child might be given $5 to buy toys or snacks – this could buy a couple of small items or 1 larger item.  A teen might be given $100 to spend on clothing – this could buy 1 sweater at an expensive store or several items at a discount or second-hand store.
  6. An older teenager should be encouraged to get a part-time job and save money towards their future.
  7. Talk to your children about the dangers of having credit cards and how easy it is to get deeply into debt.  Encourage them to pay cash when possible.   Teach them how to say ‘no’ to pushy salesmen and to think carefully when spending money, to avoid buying things they don’t need.

If you don’t teach your children how to manage their money, they will likely end up being pressured into buying things they don’t need and end up deep in debt.





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Why I don’t watch much TV

When I was raising my children, I used to enjoy watching some great programs on TV.  We would sit together as a family and watch Little House on the Prairie, The Waltons or Eight is Enough.  If you don’t recognize those names, they were programs from the 70’s and they were wholesome, family viewing.  You didn’t have to worry about your children hearing or seeing anything that was inappropriate.

Today, there is really little on TV that is even worth watching.  In my opinion, there are few programs that are suitable for all ages, but most of the programs show too much violence, sex and the language leaves a lot to be desired.   Our young people are learning that it is okay to engage in activities that are inappropriate, dangerous to their health and damaging to their relationships.  The media promotes violence and sex as being exciting and rewarding when the exact opposite is true.


A few days ago, I was sitting with my husband watching TV.   He can’t just sit in our living room and not watch the TV, so when we eat supper, I sit with him and watch a game show.  A commercial came on about some marvelous product that women simply can’t do without.   There was a nice-looking lady talking to a man about some wonderful cream that reversed the aging process.  She even had a small tube of it that you could carry in your purse.  Isn’t that great!  If you happen to feel a wrinkle coming on while you are out, you can just reach in your purse and apply the cream.  Then poof….the wrinkle disappears.  How ridiculous is that?  The problem is, there will be many insecure women who will rush to the phone to buy the product.   Then when the product doesn’t work, these poor women, who are already emotionally damaged, will feel even worse believing it is because something is wrong with them.  It is so sad that companies prey on weak people just to make a buck.

We should be working together to help people feel good about themselves and not be making them feel bad about their self-image.  I meet so many people in my coaching, both women and men, who are so broken and insecure, that they will believe anyone who promises to fix their lives.

What are you watching on TV?  What are your children watching on TV?  Does it help you or hurt you?  Don’t let the media tell you that there is something wrong with how you look.   Instead of trying to find a magic potion to keep us younger or make us good about ourselves, we should be working hard to live a healthy lifestyle – eating properly, exercising and eliminating any bad habits that affect our health.  Then we wouldn’t have as many wrinkles to erase and excess weight to lose.  We would look younger and healthier and stay active well into our senior years.

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Most of us spend our lives trying to change something thinking that if this person or this situation were different, than we would have a better life.  We think that if our husband or children would change, we would be happy.  We think that if we got a better job or made more money, life would be easier.  We think that if we could just make ourselves look better or lose some weight, we would have lots of friends.

The problem is…..we can’t change anyone else and often can’t change anything about our life situations.   We can’t change our family, our friends, our work/school situation or things that go on in the world around us.

However, if we make positive changes to our own lives, it will often influence the people around us and we will be able to see life from a positive perspective.   Change is possible, but it has to come from within ourselves before we will find any happiness or success in our lives.  Family and friends won’t change unless we change first.  Life around us won’t change unless we change first.  Our future will never change unless we make a decision to change.

Start working on making positive changes in your life and then go and change the world around you!

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