imconfident

I sincerely believe that it is far more beneficial and far less costly to help a child build confidence than it is to fix an adult who has little or none.

Don’t make a mountain out of a molehill!

What does it mean to make a mountain out of a molehill?  It means that we make a big deal about nothing, that we turn a minor issue into a major issue, that we exaggerate something way out of proportion.

Life always brings its daily problems.  Some are big, some are small and we need to determine which ones need to be addressed and which ones need to be dismissed.   Otherwise, we will be wasting a large part of our lives dealing with unnecessary things.

We need to stop and ask ourselves a couple of questions:

  1. Does this issue really matter?   Is it important enough to address and will it even matter tomorrow, next week or next month?
  2. How will my reaction to this issue impact the people involved?

When we make a big issue out of something that is not really a big deal, we risk a breakdown in communication with others.   Looking back at my life, I realize that I made a lot of mountains out of mole hills – the result was bigger mole hills and more problems.   I still do make a big deal about some minor issues, but I’ve learned how to control my reactions, so most of my mole hills stay small.

Learning to stop and think and not to react quickly when life situations happen can help us live a happier, more peaceful life.   Life is way too short to take everything too seriously – just the important stuff!

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You can’t judge a book by its cover

This phrase originates from an article written in 1929 in the journal ‘American Speech’.   It tries to tell us that you can’t really know what is inside a book just by how the cover looks.  The cover might be quite simple, but the story might be very exciting.  On the other hand, the cover might be colourful and look inviting, but the story might be dull and boring.

It is the same for people – you can’t judge a person by the outside.  People can be very different from the picture they portray to the world because they aren’t showing their true self.   We often hide our real self because we don’t think that people will like us.

I have personally misjudged people by a first impression to later find out what a great person they are.   Speaking for myself, I appear to be shy, quiet and serious,  but once you get to know me you will find out that I’m totally the opposite.  For most of my life I was shy, but now I can be pretty gutsy and I’ve always been loud and  I laugh at the silliest things.  People don’t think I’m adventurous, but I ride horses and drive a gas scooter.

So when you look at someone, don’t just judge them for how they look, speak or act.  You may not think they are someone you would like to know, but they may be a really terrific person.  Try looking inside and give the real person a chance to come out.  We are all different and that’s what makes this world a great place to live.  Wouldn’t it be awfully boring if we were all the same?   Yikes!!!!

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You were born an original, don’t die a copy

I love inspirational quotes and I have a few favourites.   This is one of them.  It is actually the name of a book written by John Mason that talks about how God created us to live a life of purpose.   I haven’t read the book yet, but it is on my to-do list.

This quote really makes me think about what I have done with my life.   Have I been successful in fulfilling my own dreams and reaching my own goals?  Or have I fulfilled someone else’s dreams and reached someone else’s goals?

We all try so hard to be what other people want us to be.  We want to be accepted and loved, but we don’t think we are good enough, so we try to copy other people.  Often these other people have just as many flaws as we do, but we don’t see them.

It has taken me most of my life to realize that I should just be the person that I was originally created to be – a unique individual with special talents and abilities.  I don’t want to be a copy of somebody else, I just want to be me.

The world would be full of happy, well-adjusted people if we would stop comparing ourselves to others and trying to change ourselves into something that we are not supposed to be.   Don’t try to be somebody else.  Just be the person you were created to be!   Be confident in yourself!  Believe in yourself!  There is only 1 of you – 1 special you!!!  YOU ARE AN ORIGINAL!

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Mirror, mirror, on the wall

When you look in a mirror, what do you see?  Do you see flaws and imperfections?   Do you criticize yourself and feel bad about what you see.

Many people have distorted ideas about who they really are because they are not looking through their own eyes, but instead are looking through the eyes of the world.  Society is obsessed with beauty and body image and this makes us feel that there is something wrong with us.   We are too big or too small, too fat or too thin, too dark or too pale, too tall or too short.  It doesn’t matter what we look like, it isn’t right.  Or so we are led to believe.

What we see in the mirror should be a reflection of the person we really are, a unique and special individual.  It should reflect not just how we look on the outside, but also how we look on the inside.   Our confidence and self-esteem should shine brightly in the mirror.

The following drawing shows what happens when we don’t see ourselves clearly for who we are.   This was something I heard in a seminar and I tried to draw the mental picture that I saw.  It’s about a boy looking in the mirror and talking to himself – his mother hears him and asks a question – he replies.  Sorry, it’s not very good, but it should speak volumes about what I’m trying to say.

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I’ll be happy when…..

I’ll be happy when…..

  • I finish school
  • I get a better job
  • I have more money
  • I get married
  • I buy a new car or house
  • I have kids
  • I take a vacation
  • I retire

Do you remember thinking any of these things?  I sure do.  We always believe that we will be happy when we get something we want or when something happens.

Then the wonderful moment comes when our dream comes true and we are extremely happy.  But for how long?  Only until we start wanting something else.  Why?  Because we are looking for happiness in the wrong places.   Society leads us to believe that we will find happiness in other people and in possessions.  However, the only thing that can make us happy is ourselves.  If we always place our happiness in something else, we will continue to be disappointed.

Research has been done on what makes people happy.  Money and possessions are important if they are meeting our basic needs and making our lives more comfortable, but beyond that, they do little to make us really happy.   Here is a list of what can make you happy:

  • loving yourself and others
  • having good relationships (family and friends)
  • having a purpose in life (setting goals)
  • believing in yourself
  • positive thinking
  • personal freedom
  • being thankful for what you have (not what you don’t have)
  • attending worship services
  • having good health
  • being able to forgive others (not holding grudges, being angry)
  • giving to others (time, talents, money)

 

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Planting positive seeds

Being positive doesn’t come naturally, it is something that has to be developed throughout our lives.  When a baby is born, it is naturally negative and self-centred.  Everything it hears and sees will have an effect on its emotional, mental, social and spiritual growth.

This is why it is so important that we plant positive seeds in our children and others around us, so they will learn and grow in a positive way.  Even if we haven’t had any positive seeds planted in our lives yet, we can start planting them ourselves right now!  By being good role models and showing appropriate behaviour, it will have a positive affect on everyone around us. 

Planting positive seeds will result in crops of:

  • Beautiful words
  • Kind thoughts
  • Caring actions

These will develop into:

  • Plants of confidence
  • Bushes of self-esteem
  • Flowers of happiness
  • Trees of success

Everything we do is a reflection of how we think.   Our positive and negative thoughts are shown in our words and actions.   If we could all plant positive seeds in those around us, think about how beautiful this world could be.  How many positive seeds can you plant today?

Let’s all work together to make this world a better place to live and raise our families!

 

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Daily Prompt – SUCCESS

Being successful does means that you have lived your life well.  However, it all depends on how you define success.  Society defines success as having money, power and possessions; placing the emphasis on what you have instead of who you are.  Many people believe their value comes from what others think of them.  They are looking at their lives through glasses that are clouded by society’s ideas and fail to see any successes in their lives.

When I consider the question, What is a life well lived to you?, I am now able to take off my clouded glasses and look clearly at what I have accomplished in my life.

Having lived well to me means:

  • always doing my best
  • having good relationships
  • helping other people
  • being thankful for what I have
  • continually learning and growing
  • trying to see things from a positive perspective
  • being able to handle life’s difficulties effectively
  • reaching my goals

If I can live my life with the love and respect of family and friends, knowing that I have done everything I can to reach my goals, I know that my life has been successful.

I challenge you to take off your clouded glasses and look at what you have accomplished in your life.

Here is a short poem by  Bessie Stanley that sums up my thoughts very well….

To laugh often and love much; to win the respect of intelligent persons and the affection of children; to earn the approbation of honest citizens and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to give of one’s self; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to have played and laughed with enthusiasm and sung with exultation; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived—this is to have succeeded.

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Are you a worrywort?

I used to be a real worrywart.  You know, someone who worries without just cause.  People worry about almost anything – other people, the weather, money, jobs, health and everything in between.   “It is supposed to rain the day we leave for our vacation”.  “I won’t have enough money to pay my bills”.  “I might be sick for the concert”.  “Nobody will like me at my new school”.  “I don’t think I will get that job”.  There isn’t much that we don’t worry about at one time or another.

Worrying is pointless.  It can’t help anything, it doesn’t make sense, it can lead to physical and mental problems and it is a waste of time.

I’ve heard it said that about 90% of the things we worry about never do happen.  So why do we waste our precious time even thinking about things that won’t help at all.  We can worry or not worry and the result will be the same.

When we are faced with a situation that causes us to worry we need to consider if our worry will change the situation or not.   If you can change the situation, then take action to change it and stop worrying about it.   If you can’t change the situation, try to release your worry by focusing on doing something positive.   One idea is to create a worry box where you can place all your worries and forget about them.   It can be just a plain cardboard box or a fancy decorated wood or plastic box.  When you start to worry about something, write it down on a piece of paper, put it in your worry box and forget about it.    Another idea is to create a list of things you worry about and put the list in an envelope.   If you want to see how effective this can be, just take out the slips or the list and read them over at the end of each month.  How many things actually happened?  I’ll bet you saved yourself a ton of time worrying!

Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but it gets you nowhere.  ~Glenn Turner

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Do you carry a weapon with you?

Many people would answer ‘no’ to this question, however, everyone in this world carries one of the most dangerous weapons with them all the time.  What?!!?  Yes, we do.  We carry a weapon that is so destructive it can tear apart families, destroy relationships and even cause death.

What am I referring to?  Our tongue.  It is such a small part of us, but it can be more dangerous than guns or knives and cause a mountain of damage in our lives.

When we speak we can choose to use positive words or negative words.  Positive words can impart valuable information, they can encourage, they can help others.  Negative words can spread lies, discourage and hurt others.  Words can not only hurt others, they can also hurt ourselves if we are using negative self-talk and repeating the lies that others have told us.

There is a reason why we have 1 tongue, 2 eyes and 2 ears.  We SHOULD listen more and see more than we speak.  However many people lash out at others before they even consider the consequences of their words.  Bullying is a good example of how words affect people.   Watch the following short video clip called, ‘words hurt’ –  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1j6YA03hm4k

Let’s all try to be more careful with our ‘weapon’ and try to ‘kill people with kindness’ instead of destroying them with our words.

 

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A poem to share

I came across this poem that was written by a teen named Angie Flores.  I think it is really special and I wanted to share it.   It would be wonderful if all teens could believe in themselves, like she does.  The poem is called JUST BECAUSE.

Just because I have never done drugs, doesn’t mean I’m not cool.

Just because I am a virgin, doesn’t make me lame.

Just because I’m not a fighter, doesn’t mean I’m weak.

Just because I am not a party girl, doesn’t mean I can’t hang.

Just because I get good grades, doesn’t mean I’m a nerd.

Just because teachers like me, doesn’t mean I am teachers pet.

Just because I am not a rebel, doesn’t mean I’m scared.

Just because I am quiet, doesn’t mean I don’t speak up for what I believe in.

Just because I have morals, doesn’t make me a goodie two shoes.

Just because I walk away from trouble, doesn’t make me a pushover.

Just because I think before I act, doesn’t make me a loser.

I am who I am and this is who I shall forever be. I do not care what others think of me. Like me or not that is your choice. Accept me for who I am.

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