imconfident

I sincerely believe that it is far more beneficial and far less costly to help a child build confidence than it is to fix an adult who has little or none.

Are you walking dead?

Just because we are alive doesn’t mean we are living.  It is possible to be alive on the outside and dead on the inside.  If we are just doing the same thing every day without passion or purpose,we are basically walking around dead.  We may be breathing, moving, talking, working and interacting with other people but inside we might feel empty and alone.

Every day we should think about what we are doing and work towards some kind of goal.  It might be just a simple goal like getting up, getting dressed and going for a walk or it could be to start a course, join a group or write a book.  The more we focus on doing something positive in our lives, the more alive we will feel.

A good idea to get motivated is to make a list of goals, both short and long-term.  What do you enjoy doing?  What are you good at?  What do you want to achieve?  What do you need to do in order to get to where you want to be in life?

Instead of just going through each day, doing the same thing over and over again and feeling dead inside, start doing something that will help you get out of your rut and moving forward.  Surround yourself with positive people, places and things.  Here are some ideas:

  • make a list of your skills, abilities and interests
  • read motivational books and watch programs that will inspire you
  • join an interest group or a church that can provide ongoing support
  • take a course that deals with communication and learn how to build good relationships
  • work on a healthier lifestyle – eat proper foods, exercise, get enough sleep
  • try to focus on what is positive in life
  • learn to appreciate what you have
  • spend time helping other people – this will increase your level of happiness

Are you walking dead?  If the answer is yes, than start doing something about it today!  Don’t waste one more day feeling lost and alone.  TAKE ACTION and start living your life.

Leave a comment »

The benefits of exercise

When some of us hear the word, EXERCISE, we might be tempted to groan and say, Oh no!   Exercise requires time and effort but there are so many benefits when you get active and take care of your physical body.

If you want to feel better and enjoy good health in your later years, it is important that you do some daily exercise.    This doesn’t mean you have to join a fitness club or buy expensive exercise equipment.   It also doesn’t mean you have to spend hours a day working out.  Just taking a 20-30 minute walk each day is the best exercise you can get and it doesn’t cost anything except your time.    Walk with a family member or friend and enjoy some great conversation.

Here are the benefits of regular exercise:

  • increases energy level
  • relieves stress
  • lifts your mood
  • reduces depression
  • helps you sleep better
  • boosts your immune system
  • relieves digestive disorders
  • increases your self-esteem
  • increases your longevity

You can work hard and make all the money you want, but it won’t help you maintain good health.   Try exercising for 30 minutes each day and don’t miss a single day.  At the end of 30 days you will probably be feeling better.

Leave a comment »

Depressed? Here are some self-help tips that work.

Depression is a horrible illness that brings pain and loneliness.  It can cause people to withdraw from others and stop taking part in regular activities.  This is self-defeating because it is important to keep busy and get support from other people when you are depressed.  Having struggled with depression all my life, I’ve found ways that can help beat the blues.  Here is a list of some ideas that have worked for me.   Try them and see what works best for you.  There is nothing to lose, but a lot to gain!

  1. Get out of bed at a regular time every morning.  Yes I know it is hard when you feel bad about yourself and the world.  Many times, I’ve just pulled the covers over my head and gone back to sleep which just made me feel worse.  Set your alarm to get up at the same time every day and put it across the room so you can’t just hit the snooze button.Slide15
  2. Make a healthy breakfast.  Eating healthy is good for your body and will help give you energy.
  3. Make a to-do list.  Think about what you want to accomplish that day but don’t just keep thinking and wishing it would happen.   Write it down and you will have a better chance of following through on your thoughts.   Just make sure it is a realistic list.  I made impossible lists and then felt bad because I couldn’t finish everything.
  4. Start with an action that gets your blood moving.  Look at your list and do something.  Even if you have only decided to call a friend, clean your kitchen or take the dog for a walk, this will get you energized.  Then keep working on your list until everything is done.  You will be surprised what you can accomplish and you will feel better!
  5. Compliment yourself.  Every time you accomplish something, no matter how small, tell yourself what a good job you did and encourage yourself to keep going.  It always feels good when someone else gives you an honest compliment but you should also feel good when you give yourself a compliment because you deserve it!
  6. Get support from your loved ones.  Find family or friends who you can trust to support you and encourage you.   Even just one person is a good start.   Set a specific time to talk to someone every day and this will also benefit your loved one because they will feel needed.  Consider family and friends who live far away and have them call, email or write letters to make sure you are keeping on track.
  7. Join a support group.  People who are going through similar challenges can help you navigate your way and become more confident.   You will find support from them and also be able to give them support in return.  However, make sure you test out a group for a time or two and see if the other group members and leaders are being supportive and caring.  Some groups are great, but I’ve attended a few that made me feel play with topsworse than I already did.
  8. Join an interest group, club, church group.  It can be very hard to be sociable with people when you are depressed, but it is very necessary.  Find something that you enjoy doing and give it a try!  Or do something different and have some fun!
  9. Make a nice meal and invite family and friends.  If you already live with someone, they will really appreciate the time you took to make a meal.  If you live alone, they will appreciate being invited.  If you don’t like to cook, it doesn’t have to be a gourmet meal, just make something simple and pick up a dessert or special treat.
  10. Meet a friend for coffee, lunch or a movie.  Call someone who you enjoy spending time with and ask them to meet you.   Be pleasant and enjoy a nice conversation.
  11. Never talk about your depression when socializing.  This is a sure way to drive people away from you.  This is something that I learned from experience.   It’s good therapy to talk about what is bothering you and the more you talk, the easier it gets, but you should be careful who you share your problems with.  Only talk about your depression with your trusted family members and friends, in a support group or with your counsellors.  When you are in a social setting, this is not the time to share your problems.  It also opens yourself up to people who like to gossip and spread your personal issues with other people.
  12. passing stickExercise.  Yes, I know, this is not a word that people like.  However, exercise is good for your physical, mental, emotional and spiritual self.  It helps you in so many ways and will lift your depression.  Sometimes when I was feeling really depressed, my husband would encourage me to go for a walk or bike ride and after I came home, I was feeling energized and the depression was gone.
  13. Volunteer.  There is nothing that is more rewarding than helping someone else.  Doing acts of kindness not only benefits the receiver but also the giver in many ways.  Every time I have volunteered it has helped me in so many ways.
  14. Surround yourself with positive people, places and things.  Make a habit of being positive as much as possible.  It isn’t easy in a negative world but if you keep working on it, it becomes a good habit.  I used to be negative most of the time, but I keep working very hard on being positive and have eliminated as much negativity from my life as possible, and now I’m positive most of the time.
  15. Make an appointment with a counselor, therapist or pastor.  Some people need professional help to get them started on recovery.  Don’t just sit and wait for help to come.  Go and get the help you need.  I did and it really helped me.

When you are depressed, you can only see the world from a negative perspective.  If you want to enjoy life and find happiness, you have to work hard at becoming positive.  This will help you build confidence and increase your esteem which will overcome your depression.  Pay attention to your moods and start looking after your health.   You are an awesome person and you deserve to be happy!

Check out my website http://www.imconfident.com for information on building confidence and increasing esteem.

Leave a comment »

Special moments

landon on swing summer 2014Yesterday I got the privilege of spending the evening with my 3-year-old grandson while his parents were out.   Landon is a very active child and is always eager to learn new things.  He certainly keeps grandma busy!

As soon as I got to his house, he wanted to go outside and play.  This is great because many children today spend way too much time watching TV and playing with games that don’t stimulate their imagination.  I’m from a generation that believes children need fresh air and an active lifestyle to be healthy and happy.  Of course the temperature outside was 29 degrees (celsius) so we had to stay out of the sun.   We played in the shade with one of his new toys that he got for his birthday – a bat and ball set.  Then we went inside for a break from the heat and had something to eat.

After supper, we went back outside again and played for a while.  Then we sat down, ate popsicles and relaxed.  It was great fun!

As the sun dropped, it was time to come in and start winding down for bed.  First a healthy snack, then a bath and story time.  Landon loves reading and he sits real close as I read, sometimes on my lap.  I tell him to pick out 2 or 3 books and he always comes with at least 5 or 6.  He especially likes the ones that have flaps to pull open, things to turn or doors to slide.   Reading to a child is a wonderful experience.  It forms a close relationship and makes them feel loved, while helping them learn and grow.

Story time comes to an end and it is time for lights out.   Prayers first, then hugs and kisses as he snuggled down in bed.   Looking down at a sleepy child gives you such a warm, fuzzy feeling!

I can’t tell you how important it is to spend time with a child.  When my two girls were growing up, I spent lots of time with them, but I also remember the times when I was too busy to play with them because I was trying to keep the house clean or work on something I felt was more important.   I realize now that there is NOTHING more important than spending time with your children and helping them build their esteem.  Children need to feel loved and appreciated and this is done by showing them how important they are and being involved in their lives.  We all have to spend time working, keeping our homes clean and doing other necessary things, but these should not be the most important thing in our lives.

Build some special moments in your life by spending time with your family and friends.  When you look back at your life, you will remember those special moments and they will give you a wonderful feeling.  Don’t live with regrets about the opportunities that you missed.

 

Leave a comment »

Parents are allowing their children to become overweight

4 kidsIn today’s world, being overweight is becoming a huge issue.  More people are overweight now than ever before.  Obesity rates in Canada alone have tripled in less than 30 years!!  Unfortunately this problem often starts in early childhood and is actually allowed by parents. sometimes without them even realizing it is happening.

Children’s weight can be influenced greatly by TV and internet use.  I read an article today about 2 different studies that have been done with groups of children who were overweight.

In the first study, they broke the children into 2 groups and gave them a plan for managing their weight and weekly goals.  One of the groups was given a game console with active sports games and the other group was give a game console with less active games.  At the end of the study, the group that was following the plan and doing the active games had lost some weight.

What the researchers were trying to prove is that children need activity.  They were not promoting the use of active video games, however it likely helped the participants adhere to their goals easier.

In the second study, reports were done comparing the weight of children who watched more TV than others.   The study revealed that children who have TV in their bedrooms and who watch more TV every day will gain more weight than children who don’t sit and watch as much TV.    When people watch TV they tend to snack more and exercise less which contributes greatly to weight gain.

As parents and caregivers, we need to realize that we are hurting our children if we allow them to just sit and watch TV instead of getting up and doing something active.  We all know that once we gain weight, it is hard to take it off.  So start being a responsible parent and take care of your child’s health.   Stop allowing your child to be passive, encourage them to do something active.  The best thing you can if you love your child is turn off that TV and limit those video games!!

Here is a link to the complete story.  http://www.cbc.ca/news/health/children-s-weight-affected-by-bedroom-tvs-active-gaming-1.2558270

Leave a comment »