imconfident

I sincerely believe that it is far more beneficial and far less costly to help a child build confidence than it is to fix an adult who has little or none.

Your past does not define you

on November 12, 2015

The first recipe for happiness is:  avoid too lengthy meditation on the past.  ~Andre Maurois

Everyone has a past and it leads us to where we are today.  Our past leaves a mark on us and provides us with valuable lessons.   However, our past can become a huge burden on our lives if we allow our mistakes and failures to define who we are.  If we keep focusing on past events and drag them with us everywhere we go, we can become slaves to our past and not be able to enjoy our lives.

We have all done things in our past that we are not proud of.   We should accept our mistakes and learn from them.  We can’t change what we did but we can change what we do in the future.  Making a mistake does not make us a failure.  Quitting makes us a failure so we should always keep trying to better ourselves.  Dwelling on past mistakes will just stop us from living a full, rewarding life today.

Many people have been treated badly in the past and they feel that there is something wrong with them.   They define themselves by this event and think they are less valuable than other people.  This is wrong!  When people hurt us, they are hurting themselves and their actions are a reflection of their own pain.  It has nothing to do with us and it is wrong to believe that we are responsible for their actions.  We have to stop being slaves to these past events and refuse to allow them to keep hurting us.

Everything in the past has already happened and it does not have to affect our future.   We may have had a bad habit or addiction.  We may have hurt someone with our words or actions.  We may have been abused or abandoned.  We are definitely shaped by our past but we are NOT defined by it.  We CAN move past these things and into something that is much greater.

  • We need to stop focusing on the past and start focusing on today
  • We need to stop thinking negative thoughts and start thinking positive thoughts
  • We need to stop telling ourselves that there is something wrong with us and start telling ourselves that we are great just the way we are
  • We need to stop telling ourselves that we are a failure and start telling ourselves that even though we make mistakes, we are learning and growing

Many successful people today have gone through tremendous difficulties and pain in their past, but they were able to overcome their adversities and make a difference in their lives and the lives of other people.  Jim Carrey was homeless as a teen, Bill Gates failed in his first business attempt, Bethany Hamilton lost her arm in a shark attack, Oprah Winfrey was raped at 9 and became pregnant at 14, Richard Branson has dyslexia and I could go on and on.

Never feel that your past defines you.  It doesn’t matter what you did or what happened to you.  You have great abilities, strengths and characteristics.   Every day you can make a fresh start and work on developing a new character.  Build your confidence and increase your self-esteem so you can feel good about who you are.  Visit my website http://www.imconfident.com for more information on confidence building.

Successful people maintain a positive focus in life no matter what is going on around them.  They stay focused on their past successes rather than their past failures, and on the next action steps they need to take to get them closer to the fulfillment of their goals, rather than all the other distractions that life presents to them.  ~Jack Canfield

 

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