imconfident

I sincerely believe that it is far more beneficial and far less costly to help a child build confidence than it is to fix an adult who has little or none.

Where does self-esteem come from?

on December 5, 2013

4 kidsSelf-esteem is not something that we are born with, it is something that we learn.   As children grow and interact with people and things around them, they learn new information and develop a self-awareness of who they are.

The environment we live in is very important in building our esteem.  Children that grow up in a mainly positive environment will feel loved, appreciated and wanted. Children who grow up in a mainly negative environment will feel unloved, unappreciated and unwanted.

Esteem is hard to build but easy to destroy.  A child can grow up in a loving, supportive environment that helps them build strong esteem, then go through some extremely difficult situations in life that tears down their esteem.  Some of these things can be:

  • serious personal illness or injury
  • death of a loved one
  • broken relationship
  • abusive relationship
  • financial crisis
  • loss of a job

It is so important that we interact with our children in a positive way and communicate with them effectively so they will develop strong esteem and grow up to be responsible adults.  It is also important that we interact with other adults in a positive way so we can be a good influence on them.  Everyone benefits from positive interaction.

Since many adults struggle with low esteem themselves, we need to do a self-evaluation and become more aware of who we really are.  Ask yourself these questions:

  1. Do I feel confident when talking to other people?
  2. Do I know what my positive qualities are?
  3. Do I deserve love and respect?
  4. Do I expect to have a good life?
  5. Have I set goals and work hard to achieve them?
  6. Am I a unique and valuable person?
  7. Do I accept myself for who I am?
  8. Can I accept criticism without feeling bad?
  9. Am I able to admit when I make a mistake?
  10. Am I willing to try new things without being afraid of failure?
  11. Do I stand up for what I know is right?
  12. Do I like myself?

If you answered ‘yes’ to all or most of these questions, your esteem is good.  If you answered ‘no’ to all or most of them, your esteem could seriously use some strengthening.

Check my website www.imconfident.com for information and ideas on building self-esteem.  Visit my bookstore where you can order my Caterpillar to Butterfly Self-Esteem Workbook.  book thumbnail

Start building your esteem today!  It doesn’t matter how old you are or how difficult your life has been until now.  You can develop strong esteem at any age.  So, what are you waiting for??

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2 responses to “Where does self-esteem come from?

  1. Ashley Wells says:

    Yes I agree with you that it is so important that we interact with our children in a positive way and communicate with them effectively so they will develop strong esteem and grow up to be responsible adults.

    http://raiseselfesteem.net

    • imconfident says:

      Thanks. I finally realized that my low esteem affected my children in a negative way, so I discovered how to build my own esteem and now I can be a positive role model for my adult children and grandchildren.

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